B is for Britney, Also for Boobs // The Video Music Awards


I will not deny that her body is banging, because it definitely is. Although I just googled her age and I actually thought she was older than 33?? Maybe it’s just because that meltdown seemed to last for like 10 years and aged her by about 50. It kind of scares me that I’m only 11 years younger than Britney Spears…
Still, banging body, super jealous, all that, but I would’ve disliked this no matter who wore it. If it didn’t have the centre window of flesh, where you can see her bellybutton chances are I would’ve been full on board. Bellybuttons always just feel like a step too far. Are Taylor Swift and I non-bellybutton-baring soul sisters? Quite possibly.
In my own outfits I always feel uncomfortable with a bare midriff if you can see my bellybutton and although it doesn’t always bother me on other people, it does with this. I think because that’s pretty much the soul purpose of that sheer part of the dress, to display the bellybutton. No one was THAT keen to see your bellybutton that you had to make a specific waist window for it Britterz.
And it’s all sparkly so we know how that annoys me. I’m just basically a grumpy old woman.
But at the end of the day thats not my main issue. It’s how much it does not fit around the boobs. We aren’t talking light spillage, hey-maybe-you-should-go-up-a-size,  we are talking I AM LITERALLY SURPRISED THAT HER BOOBS HAVE NOT FALLEN OFF FROM LACK OF CIRCULATION.


It looks really really painful as well? And awful? Did she not look in the mirror before she left the house?
Was everyone in her household just really focused on the television as she was leaving so they just lifted a hand in farewell without actually taking their eyes off the screen? And now they’re watching her on live television kicking themselves that they could’ve stopped this catastrophe but they didn’t?????
So confused. You’re still hot Brit, but the boob thing puts ME in pain just looking at you.
Please fix.

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